Life’s twists provided Jennifer Jeffries with an opportunity to turn her life around.  This Aussie with an attitude found herself wound around a power pole at what might have been considered the peak of her corporate career. That experience led her on a very different track, a track to well-being that she decided to share.  Today as an author, international speaker, and health practitioner she is helping women and men of all ages take “7 Steps to Sanity –for anyone who wants to have it all without sacrificing their health, sense of humour or sanity.”

Since I experienced Jennifer first-hand, I know her fresh, candid sense of humor captures an audience’s attention and starts attendees thinking about what’s really worthwhile.  Given Jennifer’s outlandish approach, when I got her book, I decided to turn right to her 7th Step, which is Chill Out, and it has two components:

1. Get a bit of perspective – is discussed below
2. Remember, life was meant to be easy! – I’ll reflect on next week

When was the last time you had your day turned upside down?  Recently I found that my automobile was unsafe to drive, the brakes needed immediate attention.  So, I had an opportunity to grumble and turn into a first class victim or REJOICE and be thankful the problem was discovered when it was.  All that was required was a shift inperspective.  The result, I ended up learning about the eastside bus system.  I also gave myself a pat on the back when I found out that using my intuition on service garages saved me over $200 and some peace of mind.

Jennifer adds a bit of punch to the idea of shifting perspective by asking, “Will plans shifted or your ’to do’  list remaining unfinished change the course of your life or history?”  Probably not!  So, accept life’s imperfections and get on with it!  Sporting that kind of flexibility can definitely reduce the stress in your life, and you are much more likely to enjoy your day and reap health benefits as well.

As you reflect over the last week, what was your relationship with time?  Did you feel time pressured or satisfied with how you spent your time?  You may have noticed, either way you are in charge, you determine your experience of time.

That’s what Einstein Time is all about as Gay Hendricks proposes in Chapter 6 of The BIG LEAP.  We are each incharge of our own time. Once we take the “Big Leap” and accept full responsibility for our time, it is no longer drives us.  Gone is the continuous time pressure because we are choosing our relationship with time and how we use it.

If you are saying “just a minute!”  I can understand.  I realized once again in the last few months that my relationship with time was an area of my life where I was often out of integrity and not satisfied, so I have been “on the hunt” for new options. Gay Hendricks definitely proposes a radical change.  Here are his steps for developing a new and more satisfying relationship with time:

•  Notice how much complaining you do about time and STOP.
•  Take that freed up energy and time that you have spent complaining and worrying and put it into choosing what you really want to do and with what attitude.
•  Notice taking charge of your time requires vigilance (no fair blaming others for not having enough) and spunk!  You are developing new ways of thinking and doing!

To my delight I discovered I began to put this new approach to time into action over the last two months.  My stress level was not where I wanted it to be, so I sought out a new health practitioner to help me deal with it.

As a result my body is releasing old stress, and the more relaxed I am, the more I want to be there.  I find myself more flexible and happier!  To take on the new treatment required my setting aside three plus hours each week. Where was that time going to come from with what already felt like a full schedule?  Well, I set my priorities and determined it would be worth it.  Now instead of begrudging the driving time to get to the treatment and back, I revel in the benefits I am receiving and practice shifting my body and mind whenever I feel tension creeping in.

So, I invite you to consider making a commitment to a relationship with time that works for you.  Who knows, it just may be The Einstein Time approach!

(For my initial post on time, see the March 15th post.  You can also find out more on the stress-relief treatment I mentioned above from my February 24th post.)

Being under the weather for the second week, I carved out only a few “in person” activities that I chose to participate in last week so that I could conserve my energy.  Attending a planning meeting for Earth Day was one of them.  Being there paid off on two levels, I was supporting a passion, and I was nurtured by loving friends and colleagues.

When you are not feeling very well have you ever noticed that engaging in something you are passionate about can almost immediately reduce your symptoms?  That certainly was true that night for me as we enthusiastically reviewed what we wanted as our theme, decided our roles and generally rejoiced in having our 8th Earth Day service at Seattle First Baptist Church. The congestion that I had experienced for a week, seemed much better. (I had not come with anything contagious, and I was still feeling a lot like a slug when I arrived!)

As we shared a meal and discussed the topic at hand there was a loving exchange, a celebration of being together with people I know and care about and who have similar feelings about me.  Sometimes these relationships develop quickly and easily, other times it builds over time.  This particular group is probably more of the later type.  We have seen group members move on for other more pressing interests, helped one friend through his process of dying and seen others move from robust work to even more robust retirement!

A striking thing about being ill, I discovered, is that I was more present to my own feelings at every level.  For me, it has made it easier to decide how to spend my time and energy.  You don’t need to wait for illness to:

• Take a few minutes each time you are about to make a commitment, notice whether the idea of making it gives you energy or drains you. 
•  Reflect on whether this is true just in this situation, or have you noticed this as a pattern with these people or this organization.  Either way it is valuable to notice.
• Use this type of information to make better and better decisions for your well-being.

One of the most valuable skills I have acquired as a coach is consciously listening with my heart.  What difference does it make?  First, I get out of my head and then I have access to the wisdom of my heart and body and to the heart of the person I am listening to.

Getting out of my head on some days seems like no small feat!  My head is solution oriented and is likely to take the logical route and quickly offer one of my answers from my frame of reference and stored experience.  When I am listening to someone else, unless they have specifically asked for my ideas, I seek to help them find their solutions.  That requires tapping into their experience or more profoundly into their heart, what they are longing for at a deeper level?  Finding out that information can bring insight and energy for a solution that the head could not deliver. 

This happened recently with a client who when she initially came to work with me was confused and didn’t even think she had any wisdom to apply to the challenges in her life.  She just knew she urgently wanted change.  Over the months she learned to trust in herself and marvel at the information her intuition provided.

To add perspective, here are the thoughts of a man who has made a career of studying the heart, Doc Childre, founder of the HeartMath Institute. 

“Since emotional processes can work faster than the mind, it takes a power stronger than the mind to bend perception, override emotional circuitry, and provide us with intuitive feeling instead. It takes the power of the heart.” 
 “Our well being is dependent upon an intricate, dynamic system of the heart, brain, nervous, hormonal and immune systems, of which the heart is the most powerful generator of rhythmic information and patterns.”
 
Consider listening more deeply this week by “dropping down into your heart. ” Doing so can not only help you hear more effectively, it also can help you integrate the multiple changes that are taking place in your life, reduce stress and help you access greater fulfillment.

For an overview of the HearthMath Solution and its application, here is an excellent article.  For learning some specific processes and multiple other resources checkout the HearthMath website.

Does the thought of leaping leave you cold or excited?  If you can conjure up a bit of curiosity if not excitement, read on! Leap has become a buzz word that I keep hearing about whether from colleague Janice Williams , career and retirement coach, Price Pritchett, PhD ,organizational change consultant, in his book, You2, and in The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks consultant, author and expert on relationships. 

Perhaps leap and particularly quantum leap is a fresh way to speak of transformation,doing something way beyond what you have imagined yourself doing before.  In any case, taking a quantum leap requires a mind shift. Mind shifts open up the possibility of powerful change.

So, if you were to make quantum leaps this year in every area of your life, what would you and your life look like at the end of 2010?

Some hints of what could be ahead are listed as key components of You2.

= Multiply personal effectiveness
= Quit trying harder
= Think beyond what common sense would allow
= Make your move before you’re ready
= Look inside for the opportunity

All of these intrigue me and some, frankly, create queasiness in the pit of my stomach.  That is probably a good sign.  What I know is that these books challenge me to take myself out of the patterns of the past that have not served me.  And, that is what I want and what my clients are hungry for, too!

Ok, these are two men.  Why would women 50 and beyond be interested in what men have to say about change?  First, these are two men who have spent much of their professional lives exploring relationships and change and have been very successful.  Secondly, they are over 50 and their age is an asset from my perspective.  They have been challenged to put their theories to work in their own as well as their clients’ lives.

As I explore leaping with you as a method of meaningful change, I will also look for women’s perspectives and input, including yours!

When we look back on 2009 it certainly helps to take heart.  One way to do this is to reflect on what went well for you, your family, the community, the country and, yes, if you are up to it, the world.  You may be saying, how could one take heart after a year like 2010?  Well, that is precisely what may just help you embrace your life in 2010!

If you are one of those for whom the year went very well, this will be a very easy and joyful task.  If you encountered significant disappointment, loss, or tragedy it may take more effort to find the wins.  Possible wins could be, you:

= Took time to feel, to actually experience the event or situation.
= Dipped deep into your well of faith and endurance.
= Came together with family/friends/community to gain comfort.
= Discerned the learning from the hardship.
= You recommitted to fully engage in living.

All of these actions are ones that cultivate RESILENCE, and resilience will help you build a strong foundation for 2010.  Throughout 2010 you will be reading more about RESILENCE* on this blog as part of the CORE strategy for cultivating Joy, Vitality and Passion in your life.
 
On my flights to and from Salt Lake City to visit family for Christmas, I heard personal stories of hardship and dissatisfaction.  As I listened to these individuals, I was reminded of the power of perspective and how getting distance from our own situation can provide that.   With a fresh perspective we can be much more at choice!

Sometimes, talking things out with a trusted friend, family member, coach or counselor who will truly listen and help you find your best answers can help provide that fresh perspective.

In my own case, I am clear that I want more sunshine – literally and figuratively!  Let me know what you would like more of in 2010. 

Thanks to all of you that contributed to the sunshine and the learnings in my life in 2009!

*If you want a head start on building resilience, read the APA (American Psychological Association’s) article on resilience at:   http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/road-resilience.aspx#

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love. – Hamilton Wright Mabie

May peace and appreciation find its way into our hearts, and may we experience the JOY of spontaneously showing love and affection for one another during this season.

I am headed to snow country, Salt Lake City, Utah, to visit my brother and his family.  My brother forwarned me to “rest-up” since we will be keeping up a jaunty pace being with his two sons and the two lively grandsons ages 6 and 8.  Four dogs will also be added into the mix!

Whenever I am with my brother and, Dixie, his wife, in their home over the holidays, I am reminded of what love looks like!  Friends and family coming and going, laughter, hugs, sharing of the latest news from throughout their family and clan.  Gifts of food disappear quickly and packages of thoughtful gifts and food flow out the door as quickly as they flow in.

We will no doubt get out to romp in the snow a bit, yes, even me!

So, may each of you thoroughly enjoy your friends and family over the holidays, and may we even extend our sense of family as we realize how blessed we are.

You’ve got to be kidding! This time of year!!? We’ll, if we don’t take moments, minutes and, yes, even half hours out to rest as we glide through the holidays we may find ourselves with a forced HALT! During that very cold spell in the Pacific Northwest in early December I got a cold that laid me low. I snuggled under covers and got up only to drink as many hot fluids as I could or to eliminate them! The “flush” plus lots and lots of sleep and a few home remedies worked.

So, what are options for REST going forward? Well, a great place to start is to look at our schedules and get real with ourselves. As I looked at my schedule this week, I paused to check-in with myself and assess my energy levels about going to each event. For the first three of the week, there was a definite “no.” Now getting those clear answers may be a lot easier in my case because I had just had a very real reminder of the consequences of not listening to my body. So, listen not just for the “yes” or “no” which may not be so clear, but tune into the level of fatigue in your body. What is it saying to you?

Another option is to take advantage of the longer nights by going home and staying there to REST, reconnect with yourself and your wonderful intuition. As a result you may find yourself saving steps, even money by doing so! Holiday errands may become simplified. That was one of my discoveries as I “Embraced the Dark” this week.

Another benefit of taking time to rest for me was discovering my body was craving warm foods. So, I cooked up an easy Creamy Squash Soup seasoned with curry and turmeric that left me warm from the inside out! Try this easy recipe and enjoy its mood altering properties as well as its nourishment.

Creamy Squash Soup

1 medium-sized winter squash, peeled and cut into ½ inch cubes (about 3 cups)*

1 onion chopped

2 T olive oil

3 cloves garlic minced

1 T fresh ginger

diced 1 t turmeric

1 t curry powder

2 ¾ C chicken or vegetable broth

6 oz canned coconut milk

2 T fresh cilantro, chopped

Salt & pepper to taste

Sauté onion in olive oil in large saucepan until onion is soft. Add garlic and ginger and cook one minute more. Stir in spices. Add squash and broth. Stir. Bring to boil, then reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, about 10 minutes or until squash is tender.

Transfer soup in batches to blender. Add coconut milk. Process until smooth. Return to pan and reheat. Season with salt and pepper. Serve topped with cilantro.

*You can also bake a winter squash in a 375 degree preheated oven. Cut it in half, remove the seeds, and put the two halves in a covered baking pan cut side up. Put 1/4 inch water in the bottom of the pan before covering. Cook squash until tender to a fork piercing 30 – 45 minutes. If you don’t have a covered backing pan, use aluminum foil to cover it. Actually, cooking it just a bit longer may have the skin of the squash virtually fall off.

** Bonus health benefits come from ginger, garlic, turmeric and curry powder.

Our monthly Divas Dive in teleclass is underway.  Join us on the second Wednesday evening of the month from 6:00 to 7:00 p.m. Pacific time.  The next one is Wednesday, December 9.

The topic is “Embracing the Darkness.” Join other Divas to explore the paradoxes and benefits of “embracing the darkness.”  Click here for more information and to register for this FREE teleclass which you can join in on from the comfort of your home or office phone.

Questions?  email me at sandra@yoursoulsatisfaction.com.

Looking forward to being with you!

Sandra J.

Sandra J.

The Diva of Delight

The Diva of Delight has been peaking around the corner for the last several months, now she has arrived.  Check her out on my new website http://yoursoulsatisfaction.com.

Women fifty and over, join me, create and celebrate your best life now.  Mine the riches of being seasoned, sultry and having so much fun! Discover how Divas Diving In, sharing their passions, can turn the lights on for all of us.