Yes, can you imagine, some wise women are celebrating being 60!  Entering new decades can sometimes seem like a daunting or dismal affair, not so for Jan Berg.  Jan is a fellow coach and valued colleague at at invite.CHANGE, leadership development and coaching services, where she is a partner. 

Celebrating YOU

Several months ago Jan realized that she was not exactly looking forward to having a 60^th birthday.  The energetic drag around the idea sparked her curiosity and determination.  What would/could bring about a shift in her outlook?  Surrounded by very capable coaches, she decided to put them to work helping her discover what would have this birthday be one to celebrate?

If you are familiar with the type of transformational coaching that Jan and I do and train others to do, the client is seen and treated as THE EXPERT in one’s life.  As coaches we help you access your deeper wisdom and the resources that are all around you. With that type of coaching, Jan began to discover what she really wanted TO BE at 60 and beyond!  She decided her priorities would count and would be placed in the forefront.  In the first 59 years of her life she had become expert at nurturing and supporting others.  Now, Jan wanted to make sure that she got all the respect and support she deserved, and, to her credit, she knows she these begin with her.

Yahoo!  Jan immediately began to make little shifts, like looking at her schedule with a fresh perspective.  What would have her excited about her day, week, and year?  One of the things she put on her calendar was a trip to visit a friend in Hawaii where she found herself charged with seeing to the well-being of treasured farm animals.  She loved the time spent there with a mixture of long talks with her friend, soaking up the sun, and helping with the family “pets.”  She also planned to go late in May to her daughter’s college graduation and combine that with a business trip to the east coast.

Life has been sweeter ever since Jan decided her priorities were very important!  Congratulations, Jan, you are, once again, a wise woman leading the way into a new decade.

Much of the time we think of LEAVING a legacy; Gloria Burgess, a woman close to 50, challenges us to discover and LIVE our legacy NOW.  Gloria’s challenge came to mind again last week as I attended two environmentally related events. 

 One of my passions over the years has been caring for all of creation, and Gloria reminded me to act on my vision associated with that passion and do my part to live my legacy.  Gloria herself is doing a magnificent job of following her own advice as she leads workshops and speaks all over the United States and abroad sharing her book, “Daring to Wear Your Soul on the Outside –Live Your Legacy NOW.”

Another women close to fifty who LIVES HER LEGACY is a colleague, Cynthia Clay.* Cynthia and her husband, Leo Brodie, co-led a book discussion on “The Transition Town Handbook” by Rob Hopkins at Barnes & Nobel in University Village last week. 

 “Transition Town Handbook” illustrates how all of us can generate communities/towns that actively live the kind of lifestyles that are proactively adapting to two of the major environmental challenges of our times, global warming and arriving at peak oil.  The acts Rob Hopkins suggests are straightforward: work as close to home as possible, scale down to reduce stress and consumption, use the most fuel efficient transportation possible, eat food that is grown with a few hundred miles or in your own garden, etc.  The power of those acts and the impact they have on the carbon emissions accelerates as neighbors join neighbors and businesses to make more energy efficient choices.

 Cynthia, her husband, and two young children began to seriously scale down their carbon emissions a couple of years ago when they sold their large home and moved into a smaller one closer to their offices near the University Village so that they could walk to work.  Her husband took the “Transition Town” training and Cynthia joined him when she realized they could begin to get the word out that ordinary citizens can make critical changes faster and easier than Congress.

Sisters, Cynthia is a woman nearly fifty who LIVES her legacy as a company owner of a virtual training company saving companies travel and training expense.  Plus, she also is living her legacy as she encourages Seattleites to create their own “Transition Town.”  Let me hear how you are intentionally LIVING YOUR LEGACY.

*I wrote about Cynthia in last week’s blog post also as I described her providing on-going leadership for WBE (Women’s Business Exchange), Seattle’s oldest women’s networking organization.

Do you have a “TRIBE?  In colloquial or informal use “tribe” is group of people or an organization where you feel seen, heard and welcomed.  When you are in or reclaiming your life after a major transition, having one or more “tribes” to be a part of is priceless.  WBE, Women’s Business Exchange is one of those places where I experience being with my “tribe,” and I have been in active in the organization 11 of its 30 years.  WBE is the oldest women’s networking organization in Seattle and it is celebrating its 30^th anniversary this month!

In a recent WBE anniversary celebration as members reflected on our collective experience of “tribe” you heard comments like, “The minute I walked into the room and women went out of their way to greet me, I knew I had found my ‘tribe!’”  “I have belonged to this organization off and on for years, and I have been seen and welcomed whenever I have attended .  One women was attending the event after this above discussion, decided she definitely wanted to join.

Visitors often feel welcome, too, because there is an acknowledgement that wherever we are in our life journey personally and professionally, WBE is a good place to be.  Thus, at any given table during our monthly meetings you can find three small business owners, two or three women from corporate or non-profit worlds and a couple in transition.  Along with time for networking we generally have an excellent speaker bringing us up-to-date on what it takes to be successful in business and/or as a leader.

Part of what makes WBE distinctive is that it is where “spirit and success meet.”  There is an acknowledgement that we are spiritual beings, and we have multiple ways of honoring that fact, the primary one we share is a meditation as we begin our meetings.  The meditations are generally just a few minutes long, and they help bring us to the present moment to quiet ourselves and acknowledge our connection.  From there everything else generally flows more smoothly. 

Two leaders that have been significant in the history of WBE are Donna Nunn, the founder who is a management consultant and trainer, and Cynthia Clay, owner of NetSpeed Learning.  Donna was a real pioneer in starting WBE when she did and her leadership lessons are embedded into the structure and stories of the organization.

You are welcome to join us at WBE any second Tuesday of the month, 7:00 a.m. at the Washington Athletic Club.

Sky* knows hundreds, if not thousands, of important artists, writers, preachers and politicians.  Daily as “Spirit Warrior” he shares snippets of those Individuals’ works through the web with what seems like great multitudes.  When I first began to receive these daily missives they rather annoyed me. “How could anyone be in touch with that many folks, and do I really need to know all of them?!! “

Over time I have come to treasure Sky’s daily offering.  Now several times a week I open up a crack in my world to let Sky in.  Through those cracks Sky educates, entertains, berates, provokes and celebrates.  Sky is someone whom I share with you as women 45 and over as he is over 45 and I have learned to trust him as someone committed to his spiritual path and who shares his own cracks and life lessons. 

Sky's sharing also shows up at a contemplative service which he instigated and helps maintain.  This past Sunday he chose to reintroduced me and others to Leonard Cohen , a prolific singer-songwriter and author, and his song Anthem.  Wow!  The chapel rocked.  We were moved by both the rich rhythms and the provoking lyrics:

“Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.”

After playing the song, Sky led us in an illuminating discussion of how, indeed, our cracks do inform our life journey, and, perhaps can be the instigators of our spiritual journey.  Years after leaving home where I rarely rebelled even as a teenager, I began my rebellious phase.  I tested some of the tried and true family values that my parents had so carefully laid down.  Expressing my rebel created one of my cracks as it provided a contrast to my “pleaser.” The rebel continues to inform my awareness of my values and what happens when I don’t honor them.

So what are some of your cracks?  What light have they brought in for you?

*Should you want to be on Sky’s email list, contact him at: SpiritWarriorSky@aol.com.  If you find that his offerings don't suit you, he assures me that you can cancel at anytime.

One of the wonderful constants in my life over the last three years has been WomanSpirit Center.   When we stand together, I find we grow faster and stronger.  WomanSpirit Center facilitates that kind of growth.  Evelyn Wemhoff and Jan Donnelly are the two courageous and wise directors of the Center which provides resources and guidance for women’s spiritual becoming.

WomanSpirit Center, “A place to be…a place to become” lights up southern Bellevue and the region with multiple workshops to foster women’s growth and well-being.  Even though in an urban area, the surrounding setting provides a refreshing exposure to nature’s beauty.

Evelyn is the primary workshop facilitator and Jan joins her on special occasions.  Other workshops are provided by guest facilitators.  Gloria Burgess, poet, author, and visionary is a frequent presenter at WomanSpirit Center.  Evelyn also offers counseling while Jan is the diplomat to the world via their website, brochures and Quarterly Events Calendar.

I personally came to know the Center when I realized it was time for a personal retreat.  Evelyn facilitated that retreat.  Since then, I have hosted several workshops there.  The following poem written by a group of workshop Center attendees reflects what can open up when you participate in a WomanSpirit Center event:

Spring:  Coming to New Life

I stand in waiting; my feet on solid ground
Freshly tilled ground ready for new life
Two ducks hiding in a pond
A pair of geese honking towards a landing.

All this activity around me also touches within
Beauty everywhere; my heart smiles
Waiting to be born
The earth pauses before the drama of rebirth.

I can pause, breathe deeply and know
The next step to new life is emerging bit by bit.

 Group poem, March 22, 2008

To find out more about WomanSpirit Center, visit their website at: 
http://www.womanspiritcenter.com/

Just when we think we have things all figured out…life hands us a curve!  Last May, the Board of Puget Sound Coaches Association (PSCA) chose to step up and create a regional conference to address unmet educational and public awareness needs.  The conference leaders asked for volunteers to jump in and support the effort.  I enthusiastically joined the ranks and we began preparing. 

Just as the conference was announced in October the economic storms began to hit people’s pocket books and psyches.  As in this situation, we are frequently confronted with “life’s storms” that seem and often do interfere with our plans.  How do we respond to those situations?  As midlife women we have experience to guide us and using coaching principles and practices can help.

 The conference was named “Conscious Choice, Conscious Change.”  And even when things had changed significantly in the outer environment and the enrollment numbers seemed to be impacted by the gloomy economic news and the holiday hubbub, the leaders, Janet Harvey, President, Tammy Redmon, Vice President and Co-Chair of the Conference and her Co-Chair Karen Steckler, kept pointing the way. Their commitment was to stay the course and have a splendid conference.  That conviction and commitment confirmed mine.  Together we would step up yet again and make this conference happen. And, the conference did happen on February 5 with a stellar outcome.

How do we deal with events that seem to take us off track?  Sandra Taylor, one of the keynote speakers, reminded us that we always have the opportunity to consciously “step up and step into" an alternate reality when the one we are in doesn’t serve us.  The portion of any change that we can control is our response.  So when events, people, or our reactions to them seem to be dragging us off course, we can take a deep breath and respond.  We can “clear our mental and emotional screens" and step into a new way of being in that moment.  The conscious choice may be from terror to manageable fear, or from fear to curiosity, or from a “no, this can’t happen,” to a “yes, it will!” 

How have you weathered a recent storm by creating a new NOW?

East and west coast Washingtonians basked in the sun as President Obama was inaugurated onTuesday.  We got relief from some rather harsh weather, and we also energetically took in warming and elevating energy as our new President spoke to us about the changes and challenges ahead.  What a model of calm confidence and leadership he and our new First Lady, Michele Obama, provide!

During his inaugural speech President Obama used “I” very few times preferring to use “we” as he called all of us forth to regenerate ourselves and our country.  Government will do its part, and we must take responsibility and do ours was the message I and countless others heard.

Responsibility fit well with his call for us to “set aside childish things” as we move forward.  This bold statement was one of the hard truths I now can hear more easily as it comes from an individual who himself has done the hard work to earn our respect.  He will be tested many more times.  And, so will we.

At midlife we have increased capacity and urgency to make conscious choices about how we want to be in the world.  What childish ways is it time to give up individually and collectively?

Personally I can shudder once again “in the winter cold” as I review all the areas I have for improvement from a redesigned marketing process to optimizing how I use my resources in my life and in my business.  And, if I take moments to return to and bask in the sunshine of this “new day,” I know “I can, we can, yes, we can can!” for we have been given another chance to step into our greatness.

Let's engage in conversations about how we can and will step into our greatness at the very time we are more attentive to the betterment of the whole.

This morning the sky opened up to bright sunshine after intense rains; that’s my sense of what is happening across the country. The speaker this week at Women’s Business Exchange (WBE), a Seattle-based organization that brings Spirit to work, was Debrena Jackson Gandy.  Her message was about next level leadership and her words of inspiration left us with vibrancy, intention and energy. Here are three key requests she made of us if we choose to be next level leaders.  Midlife women, heads and hearts up, how well do you embody these capabilities?

As a next level woman leader, engage in conscious, continual, vitalizing self care.  So often in our culture we “do, do, do” until we have little energy or focus left for taking care of ourselves.  Debrenna knows to her bone that when we take time to go within and fill ourselves up with joy, we can be full to overflowing.  Over the last few years I have used several practices to access this, and my persistence has paid off!  This year, 2008 I join with many others in inviting women to Relax and Reconnect with their inner joy and wisdom. 

Debrenna, as a woman, particularly an African American woman rejoiced in how our President Elect, Barack Obama, models the next characteristic of a “next level” leaders, attentive listening.  She emphasized the great gift we give to each person that we truly listen to.  When one feels received in that way, our capacity to give grows exponentially.  What a difference that act can make in our marriages, our relationships with our children, friends, colleagues, and especially our enemies.  Walls will come down and hearts will open up.

Debrena’s third invitation was to activate ownership.  This means that when we have something to invite people to join us in, that we enroll them.  For example, rather than simply reciting the specifics of an offer, step into the highest expression of what you are about.  “During December we will hold a magnificent event which will transform your quality of life going forward.  To make this happen, I am asking six women to join me.  You are my first.  Will you join me?   “Yes,” was the eager response.

Midlife Women, how do you think we are doing in embodying these capabilities?

NOTE:  If you are in the Puget Sound region, join us at WBE next month, and experience the live lab where we will indeed be embodying self-care, attentive listening, and active ownership. 

Headed “home for the holidays” I went to visit my brother and his extended family which has become mine.  Upon arrival at the Salt Lake City airport within minutes the effects of the blustery snow storm melted as my brother and I hugged. 

My brother has an affinity for putting just about anybody at any age at ease.  His winning combination seems to be equal parts of “sincere interest in people” and his delight in jawing about dogs, guns, and politicians, “you name it!” We share a sincere interest in people and he is much better at “jawing” than I, which means he helps me slow down and enjoy watching his ease at engaging clerks, children, and even cantankerous adults.

When we arrive at his home the scene quickly becomes a hum and blur when two grandnephews under 7, their parents and their father’s 40 pound Rhodesian ridgeback arrive.

Children are welcome in my brother and sister-in-laws’ home…and there are rules for kids and dogs.  I find this refreshing since I find my capacity for enjoyment goes up significantly when respect for all is evident.  Respect looks like a very large dog is not allowed to knock children, furniture, adults, etc. down.  Children are seen frequently and heard, and when the shrieks of excitement build, grandpa requests that the boys use their “inside voices.”  I am impressed by the fact that there truly is space even in a bustling house for everyone given “ground rules.”

The opinions diverge widely on a number of subjects and I use my listening skills to check-out the assumptions that I find can easily come to mind when I heard values expressed that are quite different than mine.  There are plenty of juicy topics to choose from:  presidential candidates, bringing home troops and when from Iraq, etc.  I notice some are more comfortable with black and white and I tend to lean towards believing there is a significant amount of gray – things I don’t know and don’t feel comfortable drawing a conclusion about without more information.

No matter who came through their doorway and, I’ll bet there were over sixty in a five day period, they were all welcome, invited in, and listened to at a level that conveyed, you guessed it, “respect!”  That careful listening and respect has etched itself indelibly into the hearts of so many over the years and draws people back to the Smith’s.

So, a few lessons on values that I took away from this holiday are:

=Ground rules set and honored can reflect respect

= Love is about listening and truly hearing one another.

= Differences don’t have to divide us; they can help strengthen our awareness of what is important to us.  They can also become harsh dividers if they are accompanied by judgment of one value being more justified than another.

Please Feel Free to Share and Enjoy:

]]> http://yoursoulsatisfaction.com/family-virtues-and-values%e2%80%a6-grounding-important/feed/ 0 http://yoursoulsatisfaction.com/total-beauty-design/ http://yoursoulsatisfaction.com/total-beauty-design/#comments Fri, 10 Jun 2005 17:09:28 +0000 admin http://yoursoulsatisfaction.com/?p=109

Thursday, June 10, Dr. Michael Braungart spoke at the 4th Annual Businesses for an Environmentally Sustainable Tomorrow (BEST) Awards ceremony sponsored by Resource Venture, a program of the Seattle Chamber of Commerce. Dr. Braungart was powerful, funny and challenging. More on him follows. First, however, I want you to know a little about the 180 breakfast Awards Ceremony attendees. Lawyers, bakers, and candle makers, were there, actually lawyers, ecologists, landscape architects, architects, corporate L.E.E.D. (Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design*) representatives, designers, small business people, non-profit organizations, and a number of folks from branches of local, regional and state government. All were there because they believe in sustainability at some level and they wanted to acknowledge the contributions of the Award Winners. The age range was great, and I mean GREAT! There were lots of people under 30 and those up into their seventies. They were alive, energized and eager to hear what Michael had to say. Dr. Braungart, Michael, pulled no punches. He first slides showed smog, pollution, etc. letting us know that America has been consciously/unconsciously committed to GUILT and has set up recycling as a way to assuage that guilt. He challenges that that is not our "HIGH DREAM!" We don’t even really want to settle for "sustainability." He believes we actually want much more, we want the full advantage of our internal and external resources, our creativity, and our spirit. Taking a trajectory that is pointing in that direction is what will lead us out of the dark cycle that is polluting our "nest" – air, water and natural systems. Dr. Braungart and his partner and co-author of Cradle to Cradle, William McDonough, believe in Cradle Design/”Total Beauty Design” that defines a framework for designing products and industrial processes that turn materials into nutrients by enabling the formation of cyclical material flow metabolisms. With this design focus "waste equals food" for another product or process. For example, they have helped design a Ford SUV that is fully recyclable in 5 years, you lease it, and when you return it, the materials are "up-cycled" in a way that maximizes use and minimizes unusable waste. (They do know where the U.S. consumer lives!) If you want more of the science, by a copy of Cradle to Cradle or Natural Capitalism and check out Braungart’s website at www.braungart.com. Excellent regional resources if you are considering eco-efficient innovation are: www.resourceventure.org and the Sustainable Industries Journal Northwest (www.sijournal.com).