Open Up Space for New Possibilities

When things seem to be going upside down, take a little space.  Yesterday I noticed that my digestive system was kicking up a fuss and I felt like I was growing to a new pant size.  Not much fun!  This is one of my body’s amazing ways of getting my attention.  I had had a very tightly scheduled couple of weeks with another on its way.  So, what to do?  No accident within hours I was reminded twice of the importance of making space in my life so that the quality of it can soar. 
 
One of the reminders came from Madeline Gerwick, business consultant, and astrologer of Polaris Business Guides.  From April 18 to May 11, according to Madeline, we can expect to have things go amiss from technology to communication.  Thus,it is a great time to give yourself about 50% more time on projects, getting places, and in making plans both personally and professionally.  This extra time can allow you to think through communication and plans and make any needed revisions.  Given that I had created some less than stellar communication the day before, Madeline got my attention.

The other source of inspiration was internationally known speaker, breakthrough specialist, and bestselling author, Joe Nunziata. 

 “The universe requires space to connect and bring you the things in life that will help you move to a higher level.  In many cases you must keep this space clear for some time before receiving delivery.  You will have to create more quiet time on a regular basis to accelerate this process.”

Ho, given my epicurean bent for adding more delicious options to my life, this definitely gave me pause and perhaps you.

  • What are you up to creating?
  • What impact could giving yourself more space and time have on the quality of your life right now?

Take a moment to close your eyes and scan your body.  What is your body telling you?  Give it that gift of attention and then allow its wisdom to inform you.  As I take a few minutes to provide this space for my body, it soaks the attention up like a sponge and helps me shift into a gentler way of being going forward.

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Timely Tips for Sanity and Ease

What if life could truly be easy?  That lightens me up just thinking about it!  As I read Jennifer Jeffries’s book  “7 Steps to Sanity,” she suggests that we “chill out” as a major way to create ease in our lives.  Her major option for “chilling out” was surprising and refreshing.

Jennifer is a woman who has been through corporate “burn-out,” and that experience really rearranged her priorities.  Today she speaks frequently with corporate groups.  When she encourages CEOs and their employees to “chill out,” she finds out what they currently do to experience more ease in their lives.  She found that they frequently add recreation homes, toys, cars, and gadgets.  The result for those people often is not more ease but more stress.  The stress came from adding expenses which meant more work to pay for them.
 
Her recommendation for ease is to soak up the beauty in the life you currently have, verses adding one more thing that adds financial stress.  Evidently, the Aussies, like many Americans, have a penchant for complicating life by purchasing more rather than by simplifying our needs.

I remember as a child traveling to my grandparent’s cabin at Deep Creek just outside of Livingston, Montana,.  The vacations spent there brought lots of joy.  As the family dispersed after my grandparent’s death it seemed that keeping up the cabin became more of a chore than a joy to those living near-by.  Thus, what once brought us pleasure, may not currently bring us as much ease as it brings expense.  So, how do we adapt to what is true in our lives today?

What will you do to add ease to your life?

How does your spending support ease in your life?

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Sanity Savers – Seven Stress Reducers

Life’s twists provided Jennifer Jeffries with an opportunity to turn her life around.  This Aussie with an attitude found herself wound around a power pole at what might have been considered the peak of her corporate career. That experience led her on a very different track, a track to well-being that she decided to share.  Today as an author, international speaker, and health practitioner she is helping women and men of all ages take “7 Steps to Sanity –for anyone who wants to have it all without sacrificing their health, sense of humour or sanity.”

Since I experienced Jennifer first-hand, I know her fresh, candid sense of humor captures an audience’s attention and starts attendees thinking about what’s really worthwhile.  Given Jennifer’s outlandish approach, when I got her book, I decided to turn right to her 7th Step, which is Chill Out, and it has two components:

  1. Get a bit of perspective – is discussed below
  2. Remember, life was meant to be easy! – I’ll reflect on next week

When was the last time you had your day turned upside down?  Recently I found that my automobile was unsafe to drive, the brakes needed immediate attention.  So, I had an opportunity to grumble and turn into a first class victim or REJOICE and be thankful the problem was discovered when it was.  All that was required was a shift inperspective.  The result, I ended up learning about the eastside bus system.  I also gave myself a pat on the back when I found out that using my intuition on service garages saved me over $200 and some peace of mind.

Jennifer adds a bit of punch to the idea of shifting perspective by asking, “Will plans shifted or your ’to do’  list remaining unfinished change the course of your life or history?”  Probably not!  So, accept life’s imperfections and get on with it!  Sporting that kind of flexibility can definitely reduce the stress in your life, and you are much more likely to enjoy your day and reap health benefits as well.

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Taking Control – Vices and Virtues

A phone visit with relatives on Easter Day resulted in my being aware that there was a temporary stress epidemic in my family.  Yikes!  To hear that five adults ages 39 to 65 all concur that they were stressed-out was an eye-opener.  One of those is a woman over fifty who appears on the surface to always have things “under control.”  She’s passionately connected to a large extended family, has a full-time job and has recently lost a sister and brother to chronic disease.  As we talked on a range of subjects, it became clear to me once again that stress comes from multiple sources and that control can be something that complicates the situation or provides a vantage point.

What can we really control?  As much as we would like to, we cannot control others’ behavior whether they are our children, co-workers or bosses.  Yes, we can negotiate with them and certainly when children are younger we might be able to influence them more easily for a period of time.  Ultimately, we have limited control even over young children.  This can be a sobering fact, even something that we try to deny.  However, accepting this limitation can give us the power to make life enhancing changes.

When I decide that I am the starting point for managing any stress I experience, I can begin to determine what I can and am willing to do to reduce the stress.  

For example, when I woke Sunday morning saying to myself, “Yikes, you have really overloaded yourself with preparing this dinner for friends at the last minute,” I began to smile.   Yes, it felt very real in that moment! And the question I asked myself was, “What can I change to reduce the stress that I am experiencing?  For me it was deciding to simplify the original plan.  The outcome, four people had a simple, delicious dinner, they got to know each other and enjoy themselves, and the hostess had a great time. 

Where can you decide to reduce some of the stress in your life?

What can you control?

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Time — Pressure Point or Opportunity? Part II

As you reflect over the last week, what was your relationship with time?  Did you feel time pressured or satisfied with how you spent your time?  You may have noticed, either way you are in charge, you determine your experience of time.

That’s what Einstein Time is all about as Gay Hendricks proposes in Chapter 6 of The BIG LEAP.  We are each incharge of our own time. Once we take the “Big Leap” and accept full responsibility for our time, it is no longer drives us.  Gone is the continuous time pressure because we are choosing our relationship with time and how we use it.

If you are saying “just a minute!”  I can understand.  I realized once again in the last few months that my relationship with time was an area of my life where I was often out of integrity and not satisfied, so I have been “on the hunt” for new options. Gay Hendricks definitely proposes a radical change.  Here are his steps for developing a new and more satisfying relationship with time:

  •  Notice how much complaining you do about time and STOP.
  •  Take that freed up energy and time that you have spent complaining and worrying and put it into choosing what you really want to do and with what attitude.
  •  Notice taking charge of your time requires vigilance (no fair blaming others for not having enough) and spunk!  You are developing new ways of thinking and doing!

To my delight I discovered I began to put this new approach to time into action over the last two months.  My stress level was not where I wanted it to be, so I sought out a new health practitioner to help me deal with it.

As a result my body is releasing old stress, and the more relaxed I am, the more I want to be there.  I find myself more flexible and happier!  To take on the new treatment required my setting aside three plus hours each week. Where was that time going to come from with what already felt like a full schedule?  Well, I set my priorities and determined it would be worth it.  Now instead of begrudging the driving time to get to the treatment and back, I revel in the benefits I am receiving and practice shifting my body and mind whenever I feel tension creeping in.

So, I invite you to consider making a commitment to a relationship with time that works for you.  Who knows, it just may be The Einstein Time approach!

(For my initial post on time, see the March 15th post.  You can also find out more on the stress-relief treatment I mentioned above from my February 24th post.)

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Time…A Pressure Point or Opportunity?

What is your relationship with time?  I must confess I’ve often had a challenging relationship with time.  Being women 50 and over wisdom suggests NOW is a great time to re-evaluate our personal “mental model” of time so that we can choose one that works for us and our well-being.

The times in my life when I thought I  had plenty of time, seem rare on reflection – I like to do lots of things!  And, the times when I have been happiest, time hasn’t been as much of an issue.  How could that be?  Have you noticed when you are doing something you love, hours seem to be irrelevant, you are absorbed in the moment enjoying it all.  What’s one of those times for you?

For me several times that stand out as times when I was in alignment with time were when I shared something I love with someone I love!  For example, I go two or three times a year to visit a friend in Bellingham.  We CHOOSE a very open schedule, both suggest things we would enjoy doing and then we go from there.  The hours melt away but there is such a sense of richness that there is no angst about time.

By contrast when I get overly focused in my driver mode there always seems to be a time crunch. If this sounds familiar, you can appreciate that everything seems to have a deadline, and it was yesterday.  This can create a pressure cooker effect that impacts our blood pressure and our whole cardiovascular system.

The alternative approach to time is to use Einstein Time.  No surprise, it provides a different model of time, and you are in charge!  Well, whether that sounds daunting or encouraging, check in next week to see what it’s all about!  And, if you just can’t wait, read Chapter 6 of The BIG LEAP by Gay Hendricks which I first introduced you to in January.

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The Healing Power of Love

Being under the weather for the second week, I carved out only a few “in person” activities that I chose to participate in last week so that I could conserve my energy.  Attending a planning meeting for Earth Day was one of them.  Being there paid off on two levels, I was supporting a passion, and I was nurtured by loving friends and colleagues.

When you are not feeling very well have you ever noticed that engaging in something you are passionate about can almost immediately reduce your symptoms?  That certainly was true that night for me as we enthusiastically reviewed what we wanted as our theme, decided our roles and generally rejoiced in having our 8th Earth Day service at Seattle First Baptist Church. The congestion that I had experienced for a week, seemed much better. (I had not come with anything contagious, and I was still feeling a lot like a slug when I arrived!)

As we shared a meal and discussed the topic at hand there was a loving exchange, a celebration of being together with people I know and care about and who have similar feelings about me.  Sometimes these relationships develop quickly and easily, other times it builds over time.  This particular group is probably more of the later type.  We have seen group members move on for other more pressing interests, helped one friend through his process of dying and seen others move from robust work to even more robust retirement!

A striking thing about being ill, I discovered, is that I was more present to my own feelings at every level.  For me, it has made it easier to decide how to spend my time and energy.  You don’t need to wait for illness to:

  • Take a few minutes each time you are about to make a commitment, notice whether the idea of making it gives you energy or drains you. 
  •  Reflect on whether this is true just in this situation, or have you noticed this as a pattern with these people or this organization.  Either way it is valuable to notice.
  • Use this type of information to make better and better decisions for your well-being.
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Focus and Letting in Important Information

Have you noticed the early arrival of beautiful blossoms on the plum trees and warmer temperatures brightening your mood?  They certainly do mine!  However, if we are primarily focused on problems such as work challenges or health issues we may hardly notice the changes.  How is it that our focus so often determines our reality and our mood?!!!

Intention plays an important role here, too!  If you are intending to LEAP forward this year or win a gold medal your intention is clear and your focus is to realize your intention. Then life happens and there may be “noise on your radio reception” when it comes to your intention.  When you are aware of the noise which often starts in our own heads, we can turn up the focus button and dial down the noise button.  (The noise is often worry!)

Early on when I worked with the “noise” I thought it was a given and that I really didn’t have choice about it. Now I know the buttons are there to be dialed or the issue is to be dealt with!

Recently, I became aware that when I over focus I can drop out truly being present to my own body and its needs.  I became aware of this through the NSA, Network Spinal Analysis, work I am having done.  The work’s end goal is to increase well-being by reducing tension in the body and allow the body to provide you with important information.  The first thing that happened was I became very aware of the “noise” I created frequently in my head because of my judgments about myself. That translated into tension.  Tada!

Now as the weeks have passed since I have been using NSA I feel more sensation in different parts of my body (my shoulders – pretty tight sometimes, my chest and now my extremities).  I can now see more clearly how the mind-body connection either supports my well – being or not.  The tight focus on the goal at hand is now expanded.  I can also notice on how my current focus is supporting my body or not.  Exciting and enlivening!

How is your focus supporting you?  Your body?

If you have noise, what are you doing to dial it down or deal with it?

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Catching a Speed Driven Pattern

Have you ever noticed that when you ask for something it often shows up, except not in the package you expected?!!  Last week my post was about calming, and I provided a basic introduction to breathing for stress reduction (See below).  Guess what, the more I focused on my breathing, the more I noticed how I waited until I was definitely TIGHT and TENSE before stopping to relax and breath or break/relax and breath!  Useful information!  Lo, I had offered a great suggestion on relaxation only to be shown that I was not getting the full advantage of it myself!

Learning new habits is like that.  Before we can begin to gain competence, we get to wake up to how unconsciouslyincompetent we have been!  A colleague who has obviously taken breathing consciously to a whole new level shared her practice; “Breathe in I count to 7, breathe out I count to 7.7.”  Repeat for 15 minutes.  I have found in using this practice there is still some built in resistance from the “pusher” part of me.  She wants productivity “thank you very much!”  So, I thank her for the “reminder,” and invite her to go to the imaginary workout room I have designed for her.

 

Yoga Helps with Breathing

Yoga Helps with Breathing

For me, and perhaps you, too, this is all related to my relationship with time.

I get into trouble with runaway tension when I have created a deadline and am fearful I won’t make it.  I have set myself up for this tense-fest!  So, with this awareness, I can create a new game.  When I give myself a deadline or have one given to me, I decide what I want to do with it in terms of attitude, approach and timing.  That is called conscious choice!

In the past when I have not noticed this pattern of growing tension and pressure is when I have gone beyond the point where I could easily reduce the tension. So, gratefully, my body is much less tolerant of overdoing it now!

An element that bears reflecting on here is space.  When I slow down to review my options I feel the grace and spaciousness of it.  I can actually access a generous and wise aspect of my nature.  I make better decisions, and Providence often contributes something that I would not previously have access to.

Questions for reflection:

  • How can I be proactive about managing tension?
  • What practice/habit will support me to shift from reacting to tension to being proactive about managing tension?
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Calming Connections

Turn on the radio in the morning and I’m inclined to turn it right back off. The amount of change, conflict and chaos in our world seem greater than ever before. One way to address the impact of these circumstances on our lives is to decide that as an individual you want to have easy access to CALM. In our CORE program which helps bring you greater joy, vitality and passion, C stands for CALM.  How do we get there with the media barrage of the world’s problems and the challenges of everyday life?

One solution is to start with the BREATH. We are utterly dependent on our breath for everyday life and, fortunately, it is an automatic function of the body.  What healers and those seeking greater spiritual awareness have found is that conscious breathing can bring you a level of calm.

Take a calming moment

Take a calming moment

As you take slow, conscious breaths that send air down into the body so that it feels like it is filling the diaphragm as well as the lungs, you are:
= Focusing your awareness and
= Adding oxygen to your entire body so that it works even more effectively

Amazingly as you focus on the breath, it gently begins to calm you.  The conscious breathing positively impacts the mind, body and emotions.

As a teen I was taught another technique for bringing calmness. As I close my eyes and breathe deeply, I also learned to visualize spelling out the word “quiet” on the fingers of one of my hands. That visualization process can further anchor the calm in one’s body.

When you think of calm seas, one can imagine smoother sailing. Likewise, calm within the mind, body and emotions promote smoother sailing and clearer thinking  and you share that energy with everyone around you.

And, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day:
“Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”    Anonymous

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